Hideous mutants rarely eat together. There is no such thing as a freak lunch.
(5 votes, average: 4.40 out of 5)
Loading... (5 votes, average: 4.40 out of 5)Loading...Month: September 2006
(5 votes, average: 4.40 out of 5)Loading...SHAKING THE BEAUTY
Dear Pungents, a pun about something that will improve and revive skin elasticity, restore collagen effectively, maintain beautiful youthful and supple skin, prevent aging. ~Chen, Kuala Lampur, Malaysia
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
1) “What the elderly lack in beauty, they make up for in intelligence. Each old person is aging-ius (a genius).”
2) “Youthfulness isn’t simply genetic – agene can’t prevent aging.”
3) “Kinky? Skin’s key.”
4) “Skin conditioners don’t work well. There’s always a wrinkle or two.”
5) “Those who go to beauty collagen don’t just pay lips service.”
6) “Jesus gave away all His revitalizing skin creams – at the Last Supple.”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...My Soviet-made car never worked. It had a Lada problems. It was a Lenin. It kept Stalin; I would always have to use my feet, and Trotsky to work – and that is total Bolshevik!
(2 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)Loading...YOU GOTTA BELEAHVE
Dear Pungents, a pun on ‘Leah’. ~Heather, Valdosta
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
1) Leahve me alone
2) One Life to Leahve.
3) Leahway
4) Princess Leah
5) PLeah bargaining
6) Leahther pants
(Rate This Pun)Loading...NED: I believe Homeland Security depends on two things:
ED: What’s that?
NED: First, honouring our sheep, and second, constipating our pigeons.
ED: Really?
NED: Yes! Everyone knows that ewe-knighted we stand, while dove-voided we fall.
(1 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5)Loading...There is a cure for constipation which involves eating, not less, but more, until you’re stuffed. It’s very expensive, however, this ‘bloating’ laxative. It’s for the swell-to-doo.
(1 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)Loading...POCKET TO YA, FOOLS!
Dear Pungents, I want to make fun of my friend’s moniker. A pun on ‘fool’ and ‘pocket’ please. Thanks! ~Ryan, Bristol, UK
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
1) “Is your pocket fool or are you just happy to see me?”
2) “Man, I suck at pool. Focket!”
3) When Mr. T lost weight he could finally get into his hot tub. He said “I fitty the pool!”
4) (in a parking lot) “If all the spots are fool, then take your car and pocket over there.”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Ketchup sales are lagging far behind, after it was found that musturd is also a laxative.
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Charles Dickens was quite moved after witnessing the foul, unhygienic conditions of the English workers. One time he saw a man spitting phlegm down a sewer, and was so disgusted that he wrote a novel about it: Grate Expectorations.
(1 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5)Loading...ANOTHER STAB
Dear Pungents, I need one of your finest puns, regarding a “Sword” and a “God” in the same pun preferably. Thanks a lot fellas, keep up that good shit! Stay blessed. ~Marsellus, Manchester, UK
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
1) Listen to the Sword of God.
2) Excalibur is quite ornately decorated. It is a sword with divine properties – and so by rights it should be Goddy.
3) I was struck down by God’s sword, in one foil swoop. I was scimitarred and feathered. I was blade to rest.
4) Without his divine blade at his side, the chief Greek deity was absolutely Zeusless.
5) I was wounded by the Norse God’s battleaxe, and I’m still feeling Thor.
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