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40th annual O Henry Punoff in Austin Texas is May 13, 2017
The Pun Gents were honoured be judges and Punsters of the Year (POTY) recipients at the 40th Annual O. Henry Punoff world championships Saturday, May 13 in Austin!

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See Pun Gent Pat's previous Punoff pun routines.

All Puns for February, 2007

02/28/07

Kim Jong Ill is a sick man. He keeps thrashing about the world stage like he has Huntington’s Korea. Not only that, he keeps all his citizens starving in archie bunkers, watching All in the Faminey.

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02/27/07

The former president of Turkmenistan was delirious on his deathbed. His aides asked before he died whom he thought should be his successor. But the statesman spouted complete gibberish, rasping “gurbangulymalikgulyyewicberdimuhammedow!” before collapsing dead.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 2.00 out of 5)
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02/26/07

What do you call a midget rapper?

The human G-gnome!

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)
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02/25/07

People from Vilnius are so shy. They should call them Lookawaynians.

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02/24/07

NED: Did you just touch my ass?
ED: Sure did.
NED: You’re a pervert.
ED: Just call me butter cup!

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02/23/07

I wish I could piss on a tree! Oh, how I’ve pined and urined fir that scents of pees! Or at least dribble on my balsam.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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02/22/07

NED: Hear about the machine that can kick a midget’s ass without him even noticing?
ED: Without him noticing? Why, that ass-imp-toe-matic!

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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02/21/07

THE AUTHORROR!

Dear Pungents, I need puns on English and American writers. ~Anna, Gomel, Belarus

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1) “Hemingway was quite overweight in his later years, when he wrote For Whom Belt Holes.”
2) “Joseph Conrad wrote about an evil wind that blinds men’s eyes. It was called Fart of Darkness.
3) “Who was hung like a horse? ‘S’a mule johnson.”
4) “Which playwright was always agitating his friends? Shakespeer.”
5) “Hear that Dickens wrote a sequel to Melville’s Moby Dick? He called it A Whale of Two Titties.
6) “Jane Austen’s epic about frugality? Cents and Sensibility.”
7) “Kurt Vonnegut Jr. is a master of dark comedy. He put the laughter in Slaughterhouse 5.”

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02/21/07

Many people from the UK have pale skin. They’re like bleached Wales.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5)
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02/20/07

What’s a mafia hitman’s breakfast beverage of choice?

Cap a gino!

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