NED: I just ate at a really expensive pancake place…
ED: Was it too much money?
NED: Absolutely. It was ugly, just a crepe and billage!

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The patron saint of constipation had a grisly end: he was mar turd.

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JOG THE MEMORY

Dear Pungents, I need a few good puns about cross-country running. ~Will, Atlanta, Georgia

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Diarrhea afflicts cross country athletes a lot: it’s a case of the runs.
  2. Cross-country runners love to chase trail.
  3. How do runners get to work? They take the terrain.
  4. Running amid sharp branches could cut open your jogular.
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SEE YOU IN HALOGEN!

Dear Pungents, a politically correct but still amusing pun for the element bromine, for a class assignment. ~Chloe, Fernandina Beach

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Bromine is the only liquid non-metal: that takes a lot of peri audacity.
  2. I decided to take potassium bromide after a convulsation with my doctor.
  3. Leaving bromine in a room full of iodides is a oxidant waiting to happen.
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