Dear Pungents, I need a pun with the words jazz and classical music, something like 'he's a jazzical artist', meaning he plays classical and jazz and also rocks. Thanks. ~Arax, Yerevan, Armenia

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1) "Mozzart. Strauzz. Debuzzy: Classical, meet jazz: "
2) "Top of the clazz."
3) "Jazz + classical: kickassical."
4) "Choral jazz chanting: the Thelonius Monks?"

Dear Pungents, a pun on maids as live-in helpers. Thanks. ~Angel, Singapore

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
1) "A live-in housekeeper should be quiet. In fact she ought to be anannymous.
2) "Live-in housemaids should never talk back. No ifs ands or butlers."
3) "For lazy aristocratic existentialists like Sartre, Help is other people."
4) "I like having a live in maid. Help aupairs whenever I need it."
5) "Mafia types always have housekeepers. Because they're maid men."