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Puns tagged ‘pirates’:

01/04/12

How do epic poets hijack a ship? “Prepare to be bored dead.”

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (5 votes, average: 4.80 out of 5)
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02/07/11

ALL THAT YOU ARRGH

Dear Pun Gents, my boyfriend loves puns. I want to show him how clever *I* can  be on Valentine’s Day. I need a pun that will blow him away. He is studying physics and computer science. And ever since he was a little boy he has wanted to be a pirate. HELP!? ~Anna, Boston

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. I hope to give you ‘Max Planck’ on Valentine’s Day
  2. How does a pirate measure the area of a circle? Pi arrgh squared.
  3. OOP I did it again.
  4. Compared to you, everyone else is barely a C+
  5. You never Bohr me.
  6. I could go for a jolly rogering
  7. BONUS - Why was Blackbeard upset when he had to go to the bathroom? Because a pirate without p is irate.
TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (3 votes, average: 4.33 out of 5)
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03/26/10

Why was Blackbeard chosen to judge the baking contest? Because he was a pie-rate.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (2 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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02/09/10

Why are pirates so loud?

They just argh.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (2 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)
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11/28/09

The pirate with a parrot had a real chirp on his shoulder.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (3 votes, average: 4.33 out of 5)
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07/11/09

I don’t like the high seas. If I ever went on a pirate ship, they would clock me in the groin, and call me ‘gland clubber!

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 2.00 out of 5)
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11/27/08

They found a new way to kill pirates:

Gas them with argon.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (5 votes, average: 4.40 out of 5)
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11/20/08

Piracy is big business. It ain’t no Somali change.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 2.00 out of 5)
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11/18/08

Sailors only care about themselves. It’s always “Aye, Aye, Aye.”

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5)
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09/03/08

Do pirates wear timepieces?

Yes, they’re Swatch bucklers.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (Rate This Pun)
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06/07/06

Do pirates get their Jollies by Rogering?

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (2 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)
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02/04/06

The pirate captain was on the prow-l, looking stern. His mates all bowed to him. “This is mission of great in-port.” He looked at his cannons, then gazed at the sky and said “Bless me Fodder.” His sailors warshipped him. What a bunch of frigate idiots.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (Rate This Pun)
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01/27/05

Why was Blackbeard upset when he misplaced his jars of urine?

Because a pirate without p is irate.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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