Where can you get deals on mustard? Groupoupon.

Electric cars are silent by deaf ignition.

Macchu Picchu: Where face-recognition technology was developed.

Sorry for the radio silence! Google might punish our website for not putting out puns. That would be SEOWNAGE.

These days all airlines offer services such as wifi and  Sky pee.

The pornstar lost her job and filed for onanployment.

Afghanistan may not have the Internet, but they are kings of Khyber space.

When Sartre was forced to explain e-commerce to a cow, he remarked “Hell is udder Paypal.”

One of my legs is actually just a hologram. It give me a rather e-femural sensation.

Dear Pun Gents, we’re trying to come up with a fun name for a wall display showing the good feedback we get about our email help desk at work. So far I’ve only been able to come up with “the rating’s on the wall.” ~Muirean, Dublin, Ireland

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. ResPonzi Scheme
2. How wall are we doing?
3. The Wailing Wall
4. This wall is carved in comment.
5. Eval-holla
6. Email Mall

Dear Pun Gents, I’m creating a modding shop and came up with the name Modzilla. Need a good motto under the logo, but haven’t got there yet. Any ideas? ~Konstantinos, Helsinki, Finland

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. A Vicious Modster
2. Get Mod, Get Even
3. Her Modusty’s Secret Service
4. The Adjustment Bureau
5. Flavour of the Tweak

Dear Pun Gents, I need a pun to include the word MIMO (multiple input multiple output), reflecting a hub for the exchange of news, thoughts and ideas. I thought of puns like MIMOre and MIMOtion, but you are obviously better at this. ~Danny, תל אביב, Israel

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. MIMOzone
2. Land of MIMOz
3. MIMOry
4. MIMOzine

Dear Pun Gents, I am starting a hang-out joint based on communication; specifically Google-driven Android phones. Need a happy theme name based on the many applications they offer. ~Edward, Nakuru, Kenya (long-time fan)

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. App Repos
2. Bon App-etit
3. Go Ogle Me
4. Comm Union
5. Appy Go Lucky
6. Bar Five [as in, signal bars]
7. What’s App?

Despite his claims, Al Gore didn’t invent Facebook and Twitter. He just said “So shall the Net work.”

Sleep? There’s a nap for that.

Dear Pun Gents, I need a pun for the title of our school’s newspaper. Right now it is the ‘Zeitgeist’ but we would like something more catchy. Our school focuses on math, science and technology. Maybe something with ‘infinite’? ~Kelsey, Lawrenceville, GA (long-time fan)

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. Forget the Zeitgeist: make way for the Zit Digest
2. Kids in the LOL
3. Paper View Channel
4. Youth Tube
5. Rag Against the Machine
6. Social Median, Mean and Mode
7. Infiniteens
8. Go Ogle It
9. Readerected

Dear Pun Gents, we’d like to recognize staff members who help keep our website up-to-date and accurate and would like a clever name for such an award. ~Julie, Richmond, VA (long-time fan)

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. HTML Baby One More Time
2. Site for Sore Eyes Award
3. Kicking RSS and Taking Names
4. The Blog Monster
5. CMSter of the Universe

Dear Pun Gents, something about man’s ignorance of nature. The plague of technology etc. ~Ashley, Sydney, Australia

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. We’re on a slippery slope, ie tech-knoll-ology.
2. Didn’t Stephen King write a horror novel called I.T.?
3. To protect myself from evil technology, iPadlocked my gate.
4. It’s Life is Beautiful, not Life is Boot-able.

If Apple changed its name to Pumpkin, would their computer be a Hackinsquash?

If you check the Internet Movie Database you’ll find many SQLs.

The iPad is a product of eons of geology. Specifically, slate tech-tronics.

With the iPad, the sun is setting on dusktop computing.

What’s a morse code expert’s favourite tech website? Dashdot.

Dear Pun Gents, I need a good name for a giveaway that a company involved with phones and bluetooth devices does every Friday. ~Torin, Snoqualmie, WA

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. Pho… Pho… Phone!  Merry Xmas!
2. Phone-me of the State
3. Catching Phlies with Phoney
4. The bluetooth and nothing but the bluetooth
5. John Wilkes Bluetooth
6. It’s a call amity!

iPad? Should be ‘iPaid already’, for the iPod, the iTouch, and the iPhone. This one should be free!

Dear Pun Gents, I need a new Xbox live name. I was hoping you guys could use my name or part of my name in it. Thanks! ~Richard, Troy, MI (long-time fan)

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. For richard or poorer
2. Troy Again
3. Just Troy Mi
4. Ric Hard

Dear Pun Gents, I’m looking for a punny name for a new blog. Something shorter and more clever than, “One man’s quest for figuring out how to plan a gay wedding while negotiating freaked-out family drama and keeping sight of the real reason for getting married - the other groom.” Thanks! ~Brian, Boulder, CO

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. Groom with a View
2. Gay Mon!
3. Married to a Blog - but he’s a nice fella!
4. Aisle Be There
5. Nup it in the bud
6. Diary of Stan/Frank
7. Let’s Wed and See

Graphic designers are obsessed with kern events. Especially web designers - they love checking out Britney’s css. HTML baby one more time!

Kittens are taking over the web. It’s a cute d’ekat!

Do computer-controlled urinals have their own I pee address?

Six more pun requests fulfilled. Ask us anything!

Is the Internet haunted? Behind every link could be a horrifying, astley presence.

Do duck hunters use call wading? If so, do authors use call foreword? And do sports broadcasters use called his play?

It’s free to make a long distance call from the bathroom of a jumbo jet, if you use Sky pee.

OS X Powers: When Mike Myers promoted Apple software.

That latest online fad - Twither did it go?

For articles about celebrities kissing in public, consult WikiPDA.

The Paleozoic era was even more computerized than today. Instead of kilobytes, they had trilobites.

Which famous inventor of the telegraph enjoyed campfire treats?

S. Morse.

Microsoft knows that programming crappy software requires many shitterations.

How do midgets downlow their music?

Off of HiTunes!

Vampires hate technology. They’re all bluddites.

Poor typists are rather un qwerty nated.

Which telecom company has explosively high speed Internet access?

A T’n'T

I’m glad it’s not summer. Once, my computer almost exploded in the swell Turing heat.

The high flying JPEG lawyer was embarrassed to have lost his case to a plain tiff.

Who made a fortune with his empire of constipated software?

Bilge Ates.

Hear about that high-tech thriller, about a submarine crew that gets lost at sea due to extreme computer failure? It’s called DOS Boot. As the movie unfolds it’s clear that the vessel’s discipline was lax: not a mouse was stirring while some key bored personnel were in the washroom taking a FTP. The submarine was suddenly swamped by torrents of WAVs, and couldn’t make it to the dock. Windows were stupidly left open, resulting in an impossible Turing radius as they were overwhelmed by the C. It was a Unix situation, and as they twirled out into the ethernet the captain radioed the nearest B-52 Flying Fortran for help. “This hertz, Mac,” he cried. “It megahertz! I need a pier-to-pier transfer.” But due to BASIC errors and faulty navigation they could not find anchor, and crashed, leaving no possibility for a SQL.

My spouse is addicted to the internet. She needs her daily wife-high.

Why don’t telephone scam artists use VOIP lines?

Because it’s Internet tell-a-phony.