Why do monks make good mobile phone salesmen?

Because they can cell a bit.

Does Prince Edward have a great website?
Yes, he’s the URL of Wessex!

Managing a web site about pigs requires knowledge of MySqueal databases.

I’ll miss the internet. Thanks for the meme arrays.

I don’t know if I like HD technology - I find it a bit too Bluray.

Emails are unreliable, because they’re missing the fax.

Remember when the CEO of Microsoft freaked out on stage, like an insane monkey? Two words: The BaboonaBallmer

Midget keyboards?

One word: SQWERTY.

When our office network goes down, look out - it’s like Silence of the LANs.

NED: Sorry there was no joke online this morning.
ED: What happened?
NED: My connection was all tied up…
ED: Really?
NED: It’s the Interknot!

Internet addiction is a big problem in E-stonia.

Teflon has been around since ancient times. For example, the Gnostics.

I made an mp3 of my car slowing down. It was a record braking event.

In the digital age, how do know your child is potty trained?

When he says ‘iPooed‘.

NED: Who loaded the printer with the wrong-sized paper?
ED: I did.
NED: That’s dumb. Why’d you do it?
ED: April foolscap!

Do prostitutes look up clients on quickipedia?

Searching for an older woman?

Just Cougle it!

If Bill Gates leaves, his company MightGrowSoft. And if they drop the Ballmer it’d be even worse.

Popular fonts? Aerial gets a good reception.

Mobile technology has not freed mankind from slavery. This, despite the promise of the self-own.

Do the IT technicians on Sesame Street have to defraggle their hard drives?

A vegetable farmer was feeling left behind by technology. In frustration he threw a bushel of peas on the floor. He cried “Now that’s a pod cast!”

You can find the craziest shit when you do a Poogle search.

Hear about the Spanish cop who got a GPS tracker for Christmas, but it turned out to be faulty?

Police navi-dud!

Do hermaphrodites check their shemail?

Do babies search using GooGool?

I’ll shuffle my Excel spreadsheet data only as a last re-sort.

Jane Austen was a fan of online enumeration. Just look at her book, Census and Sensible-IT.

Which medieval scourge pre-dated spam?

Chainmail letters.

If you look at these digital photos of the wounded soldier up close, it looks like he was shot by a Canon.

In Russia do they search using Gogol?

The skin clinic’s online presence finally returned after a period of reconstruction. The dermatologist congratulated the webmaster, saying “Well this is a site for psoriasis!”

Why should you never let a large computer file taste your sandwich?

Because it would take a thousand mega-bites!

Why did the gadget lover praise the Lord when the PDF guide for his digital camera successfully opened?

Because the e-manual had come!