Being disobeyed by a subordinate is embarrassing enough. But when someone repeatedly disobeys orders I feel more defied.

My friend was fired after he stabbed his boss in the forehead with a fork. He sued for prongful dismissal.

My socialist friend thinks that hiring non-union labour to build a partition is indie fence-able.

Within the labyrinthine bureaucracy prowls the deadly Adminotaur.

The razor factory is facing cuts. Everybody might get blade off.

Do watch repairmen work over time?

Dear Pun Gents, we’re trying to come up with a fun name for a wall display showing the good feedback we get about our email help desk at work. So far I’ve only been able to come up with “the rating’s on the wall.” ~Muirean, Dublin, Ireland

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. ResPonzi Scheme
2. How wall are we doing?
3. The Wailing Wall
4. This wall is carved in comment.
5. Eval-holla
6. Email Mall

Dear Pun Gents, I’m organizing a Brown Bag penny rolling party for my branch. It’s a fundraiser and contest supporting the United Way corporate campaign. Need puns. ~Samantha, Toronto

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. Penny for your thoughtfulness
2. Rock and Roll
3. Penny rolling: A Night at the Copper-a
4. B/c donating to United Way makes Cents
5. It’s a Coin Job
6. Penny Pals

When it comes to spreadsheets, I pull no punches. I column as I see em.

Dear Pun Gents, we’d like to recognize staff members who help keep our website up-to-date and accurate and would like a clever name for such an award. ~Julie, Richmond, VA (long-time fan)

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. HTML Baby One More Time
2. Site for Sore Eyes Award
3. Kicking RSS and Taking Names
4. The Blog Monster
5. CMSter of the Universe

Dear Pun Gents, we need two team names for a management vs. employee charity kickball game. All employees work customer service for a large satellite television provider. Names must be HR appropriate, but can be a slightly inappropriate pun (ex. Kickin’ Grass). ~Kim, Huntington, WV

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. Super HRoes
2. Manage a Trois
3. Corporate Punishment
4. Emplohyenas
5. Staff Infection

The chef fired the waiter for disobeying hors d’oeuvres.

Quitting a job I don’t like is my only resign for leaving!

The motivational speaker was fired for causing too much strive in the workplace.

Dear Pun Gents, we’re updating our clients information and have to call people to update/confirm email addresses. We’re forming teams to do it in. Any ideas? Cheers! ~Marlon, Melbourne

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1. Address for Success
2. Track Team
3. Emailleability
4. The Check is in the Email

Torturers like office work. Especially the regular metings.

I didn’t want to fetch a sandwich for my boss, but I was forced into sub mission.

Work metings are the ultimate form of punishment.

There’s a high incidence of cancer at polyp and paper mills.

It’s hard to be the mayor of Sanaa - you’re surrounded by Ye men.

People enjoy social networking sites to escape the rat race. For example, www.mice-pace.com

Does the Association of Headhunters have close ties to the Stealworkers Union?

Being a Starbucks barista is not a good job, but it’s their latte in life. It’s an espresso train to nowhere. It’s a foam pas. I don’t hold their work in a steam.

Companies know the cost of hiring brain-dead employees: it can be ex-pensive.

The manager who couldn’t afford new pens obviously didn’t have a Bic budget.

If you’re at work and the shit hits the fan, the first thing to do is look for your pooper-visor.

The unemployed man was married to a woman who was never satisfied. When he finally got a job, she was irate nonetheless. “Now,” she said, “you are home less!”

Hear about the clone who couldn’t function without his morning copy?

Let me tell you about the reek I’ve had: First off, I work at the ol’ factory. But a few days ago I ran into some cash problems, so I asked my boss for a smell favour. What was I stinking! Now I have to avoid her, cuz she nose I odour money. Hmm, maybe if I stop wearing deodorant to work, they’ll give me a high-ranking job?

Why do those with big noses like making out with their supervisors?

Because - they’re pro-boss-kiss!

During work stoppages on the great Egyptian canal, the workers grew Suez-idle.

Working in Mexico doesn’t peso good.

How did the genie mock the overworked busboy?

He said, “I’ll grant you three dishes.“

What did the out-of-work doctor say?

“Patients is a virtue!”