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Pun Gents :: Original Pun of the Day Archives for February 2008 RSS feed:  (Click here for subscription instructions)02/29/08 Which philosopher was most concerned about mall opening and closing times? 02/28/08 Radioactive cows are a glow bull phenomenon. 02/27/08 NED: Did you hear, I've become a Scientologist? 02/26/08 Listening to U2 in church gives me a mass-ive Bono. 02/25/08 Avocado's Number: The amount of particles in a guaco mole. 02/24/08 Social climbers are trying to reach higher into the statusphere. 02/23/08 The worst ecological disaster in Chinese history was perpetrated after a wild night at a strip club, when Communist Party officials misheard their drunken President eagerly calling for "Three Gorgeous Dames!" 02/22/08 There are four sides to every car crash. That's what they call a wrecktangle 02/21/08 After Ravi Shankar was seriously burned in a fire, he had to get numerous skin grafts from a caucasian donor. After the tragedy he decided to take up singeing, and he was thereafter better known as "Apache Indian". 02/20/08 Hear about the nursery rhyme for women with low self-esteem? Hump-me, Dump-me. 02/19/08 Are midgets mean? Yes. They like to be little. 02/18/08 When New Orleans was sinking, all FEMA did was declare Louisiana a state of emergent sea. 02/17/08 People who take flight from Cuba, never to return are known as Castro-nots. 02/16/08 They say the Q-tip was the perfect invention, but now that Swab 2.0 is here, it's even more swab and sophisticated. Small wonder it's cotton. It's the product of the ear for 2008. 02/15/08 Do overprivileged children go online for their social networthing? 02/14/08 Many Quebecers venerate their province's flag, but trample on the Canadian flag. One is the Fleur de Lis, the other is the floor doiley. 02/13/08 As a feminist, I don't make jokes about hose. It is a socksist remark. It hits too clothes to home. 02/12/08 Perfume business is a monopoly, because of who controls the distribution chanels. 02/11/08 Ophthalmology puns make me glassy eyed. I don't like vitreous humor. 02/10/08 Louis Pasteur loved his cattle. When he was a professor he received his degree honor 'is cowsa. 02/09/08 Sex and money talk in the Indian music world, where the rock stars are often surrounded by screaming rupees, looking for a paisa the action. And ten thousand rupees certainly indicates a lak of it. 02/08/08 Which Nazi loved Michael Jordan? Joseph Goebbels. He loved it when things were Goering well for the Chicago squad, and especially when MJ would achieve Luftwaffe and Reich up the points. For the fans, it was beyond their wildest iMaginotion. It was Panzermonium. 02/07/08 I stopped gambling after reading John Milton's Pair o Dice Lost. 02/06/08 Porn fluffers who don't make it into the industry often go on to airline careers as fellate attendants. 02/05/08 Those with vitiligo can still have careers as supermottles. 02/04/08 Which actor gave the most grateful Oscar acceptance speech? T.Hanks. 02/03/08 Homeless men in New England are standing in line - it's Soup Bowl Sunday! 02/02/08 Being a Starbucks barista is not a good job, but it's their latte in life. It's an espresso train to nowhere. It's a foam pas. I don't hold their work in a steam. 02/01/08 Sounds effects pioneer Thomas Dolby graduated from university magna cum loud. For more Puns of the Day, see the rest of the Archives. |
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