Pun of the Day

Leguminous plants have a reputation for bean stalkers. In fact they caught a nut outside the hospital, a real crazy lentil patient, whom they nabbed watching a chick pea in the can (they knew it was a guy because of his finely trimmed pistachio). He wanted to mac a dame, especially one from macadamia. They threatened to soup his ass, but he said ‘Legu me, almond innocent fellow. It’s not my fault, I’m an old clover of hers, and she pushed me over the veg!’ She kicked his peanuts and said ‘Don’t let me cashew in here again – it’ll be a long time before alfafa that again’ and when he went to the bathroom the next day his pea was split . And he had next to nodules.