Daily jokes, one-liners & quality groaners
Pun of the Day
NED: I believe Homeland Security depends on two things:
ED: What’s that?
NED: First, honouring our sheep, and second, constipating our pigeons.
ED: Really?
NED: Yes! Everyone knows that ewe-knighted we stand, while dove-voided we fall.
Pun of the Day
Eunuchs tend to be chivalrous. As the French say, ‘nob-less oblige’.
Pun of the Day
There’s an old proverb that recommends against circumcision: Spear the rod, spoil the child.
Pun of the Day
NED: St Patrick’s day is 10 months away. Should I work on my Irish accent?
ED: No, if it ain’t brogue, don’t fix it.
Pun of the Day
If you are at the wrong end of a chainsaw accident, try to understand. To err is hew man.
Pun of the Day
Onan is an island.
Pun of the Day
As scholars of dead languages, we want to have archaic and eat it too.
Pun of the Day
Life is much better when I’m not arguing with some fat-headed swine. Pig no rants is bliss.
Pun of the Day
Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder. But booty is in the hand of the buttholder. Pain in the eye of the beeholder.
Pun of the Day
Almonds are created equal.