Dear Pungents, I’m thinking of buying some Pungents merch, but I’m not sure if I should buy the large or the extra-large t-shirt. Can ya help a brother out with a little zinger to help me make my decision? ~Cristobal, Little Portugal, Toronto

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1) “Well, if it were tree-shirt sizes, I’d tell you to get extra-larch.”

2) “If you were psychic, you’d know you’d need a medium.” [technically not a pun – alternately, “If you were a hungry carnivore, you’d know you’d need meaty-yum.”]

3) “Which size? Anyone who nose the Pungents should get smell.”

4) “Whatever size you pick, be very careful after placing your order – You don’t want to be known as the guy who buys merch and dies.”

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