The magician nonchalantly stabbed his assistant, displaying remarkable slayed offhand.
When someone stole my toilet paper, I felt like I had been visited by the Grim Wiper.
Why are funerals usually held in the a.m.?
Because – they’re in mourning.
I can never remember if all of Louis XVI’s relatives were guillotined too. Let’s not split heirs.
Foreigners weren’t allowed in the cemetery because they could only inter nationals.
The world’s first murderer was an Abel-bodied male.
When the Pirates of the Caribbean ordered my death, my mind went plank. I knew I was in Depp ship.
Auctioning a corpse: now that’s morbid!
Hear about the play they staged at a cemetery?
It got grave reviews.
Don’t kill an Italian stereotype. That’s ginocide.