My dad tried to fuel his car with Viagra. Erected pretty bad. Though I also heard the AAA is trying to pass off Viagra as fuel. I think they’re stiffing their members with that one! The cops pulled me over and said ‘Here, penis cup.’ Also, Viagra has a new celebrity spokesman. That’s right: Randy Johnson.

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Someone stole my Swedish car: it’s a real Saab story. I don’t mean to get emotional; I guess I’m too inVolvo’ed. Heck I’ve even considered going scuba diving, to see if it’s buried underwater – but I’m afraid of getting the Benz. I know, it’s my own fault; I really should be driving a Mazda Me-oughta, especially after the hos had blown on my loaner, a Poontiac. GM cars really make me Buick. (As for British imports – get Bentley!)

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