I committed a crime during Oktoberfest, and my friend ratted on me to the cops. Man, what a schnitz.
Today is Hallowe’en! I don’t have a scare in the world.
I’m tired of writing Xmas greetings. Next year I’m doing mine on cardbored.
Forget Christmas carols. It’s time to perform Johann’s arias, because today is Bach sing day.
The weirdest celebrity Christmas ever was when Eminem sang in reverse and then disappeared. He un-rapped his presence.
Today, people are drinking enough liquid to turn the O’sheas green.
What’s Santa’s favourite snack? A crisp Pringle.
Oil drillers never stop working, even when on hole a day.
Today is National Buttermilk Biscuit Day, National Dance Like a Chicken Day, and some Mother, more important holiday.
You can get in trouble in the hood today, if you flash the Old Gang Sign.