I was choking on a popsicle, and my mom said “Quit yer lolly gagging!”
I stepped on a toy plastic brick. It was Leg ow.
The necrophiliac gold-digger married a drowned corpse because she heard he was bloated.
I swallowed a large pair of earrings. Can the doctors remove them? I remain hoopful.
The French-Canadian lumberjack cut his friend in half. He was accused of sawed-ami.
Which motorcycle gang inflicts damage via paper cuts? The Bandaidos.
Don’t drill through your skull! It will bore you out of your mind
I don’t know what snake bit me. It acted with venonymity.
My friend died from a bee sting. Histaminer suddenly changed. Too bad, swell guy, but it wasn’t anaph to save him. At least the puffins didn’t get him.