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Puns tagged ‘accidents’:

03/29/17

The necrophiliac gold-digger married a drowned corpse because she heard he was bloated.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (Rate This Pun)
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02/08/17

I swallowed a large pair of earrings. Can the doctors remove them? I remain hoopful.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (3 votes, average: 4.33 out of 5)
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12/07/16

The French-Canadian lumberjack cut his friend in half. He was accused of sawed-ami.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5)
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11/18/16

Which motorcycle gang inflicts damage via paper cuts? The Bandaidos.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 1.00 out of 5)
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11/17/16

Don’t drill through your skull! It will bore you out of your mind

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (3 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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06/27/16
Humpy Dumpty died broke. Too much partying and shell abrasion. It was all the crack. He just lay there. You could see the whites of his eyes. His next of kin was Oh no Yolko!
TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (2 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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06/13/16

I don’t know what snake bit me. It acted with venonymity.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (10 votes, average: 4.90 out of 5)
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06/12/16

My friend died from a bee sting. Histaminer suddenly changed. Too bad, swell guy, but it wasn’t anaph to save him. At least the puffins didn’t get him.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (2 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)
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02/12/16

Hey soldier, how did you lose your hands? “Nay palm.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (2 votes, average: 1.00 out of 5)
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11/29/15

People who drop ice cream can be so cone descending.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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