For her role in kidnapping the 101 spotted dogs, Cruella De Ville was sentenced to the fires of eternal dalmation.

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Hear about that high-tech thriller, about a submarine crew that gets lost at sea due to extreme computer failure? It’s called DOS Boot. As the movie unfolds it’s clear that the vessel’s discipline was lax: not a mouse was stirring while some key bored personnel were in the washroom taking a FTP. The submarine was suddenly swamped by torrents of WAVs, and couldn’t make it to the dock. Windows were stupidly left open, resulting in an impossible Turing radius as they were overwhelmed by the C. It was a Unix situation, and as they twirled out into the ethernet the captain radioed the nearest B-52 Flying Fortran for help. “This hertz, Mac,” he cried. “It megahertz! I need a pier-to-pier transfer.” But due to BASIC errors and faulty navigation they could not find anchor, and crashed, leaving no possibility for a SQL.

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Did you hear about the remake of the classic Star Wars film? It was set inside the Drug Enforcement Administration, and it was called The Hemp Pyre: Strike Match.

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