When it comes to Facebook, the best defriends is a good offense.
I’m so baddass, I pick flowers like it’s the Wild West. You know, roundin’ up a posey.
Take public transit? Hellz yeah, that’s how I bus to move.
What does Admiral Ackbar say at the circus?
“It’s a trapeze!”
I went to a Japanese food place where the service takes forever. I guess it was a wok on the ‘while’ side.
Men should cut their hair before it gets unruly: aka mows before ‘fros.
I angered my butcher. It only made things worse when I told him “don’t halve a cow.”
There is no smoking in my menswear store. Clothes, but no cigar.
I don’t digitize my home movies. I keep it reel.
When a singing bird wakes me, I’m like “This means warble.”