Quality of pub food is measured by which instrument? A barroom eater
food and drink
Being Scottish is an addiction. It’s quite haggis-forming.
I lose my breath when I drink Starbucks, I get so excited. It must be a Venti elation problem.
There may be widespread food shortages in Africa, but there’s a real problem with obesity in Burkina Fatso.
Which celebrity microwaves his hotdogs?
Frank Zappa.
At the United Nations Conference on Poultry in Pecking, China, several accords were discussed, including a complicated capon-trade system. But as the cluck was winding down on the agreement, many nations cried fowl, arguing that capon-trade would only lead to more hen-some profits for agribusinesses, and real progress would be nothing but chicken feed. In order to lay down their yolks, developing nations staged a coop! Their leader made a speech, saying “When all people, white and dark, meat, there is hope.” This democratic gesture inspired everyone, even nations whose broil kings were in attendance. But the cynical members of the global press downplayed the developments, just drank a lot of Wild Turkey and got totally basted. #classicpun-011026
Gummy worms taste too Wrigley
Put a citrus fruit on top of your drink: It will taste sub lime.
What’s Michael Jackson’s signature Japanese-style beef dish?
Moo-in-wok.
Why were hangings in the Old West very well attended by caterers?
Because, they said “I hear there’s gonna be a luncheon!”