When Satan is constipated, he eats Hellman’s mustard.
I want a girlfriend with regular bowel movements, and I’ll search the gal laxy to find her.
Drinking Metamucil really gets the potty started.
Constipated? Call a next-turdminator.
If you think that drinking coffee might cure your constipation, maybe you should drive a Peugeot.
What’s the emoji for constipation? A: Colon, full-stop.
If you eat the wrong cereal, you might feel Kellogged up in the morning.
Your favourite All Bran commercials can be brownloaded from the Internet.
Statistical data show that stool softeners like Metamucil follow a log-normal distribution.
I tried to sign off ConstipationForum.com, butt I remain logged in.