My girlfriend’s belief in astrology taurus apart.
Yes, I will stab a sweet potato with a plastic pen to impress a lover of Shakespeare. I yam Bic-pen to meet ‘er.
This Valentine’s Day I’m going to swipe right on my Friendster profile. Oops, did I just date myself?
My girlfriend complained I never took her anywhere, so we went to the Grand Canyon so she felt valley dated.
When I got rejected by a woman who was hooked up to life support it was so invalid dating.
Some women are attracted to morons. They can’t resist a man in uninform.
To set the mood, my girl microwaved some gorgonzola. Cheese so hot when she does that.
I moved to the Italian capital and married a fumigator. But we got divorced because after a while the Rome ants was all gone.
An investor stole my girlfriend. He was a date raider. A stocker. He just wouldn’t share.
What does a goose look for in a gander? Honkiness.