I just got a job running Old McDonald’s farm. I’m the new CEIEIO.
Where can you buy a mountain goat? Use Cragslist! It’s free and they won’t send you a billy. I got a great deal on one by Jean Paul Goatier.
Even after Hell was incorporated, Satan retained soul ownership.
Handing out entry bracelets at a concert is a safety precaution: it’s smart wrist management.
Hear about the businessman who spent his days combining chickens?
He wanted to make a hen-sum profit!
I can install a tree in your cellar. Bark in basement prices!
The best time to purchase stocks is when the market hits bought em.
If Shakespeare Worked at a Hardware Store:
- Measure for Measuring Tape
- Two Gentlemen of a Rona
- Taming of the Screw
- Romeo and Juliet Balcony
- Awl’s Well That Ends Well
- Tight As a Door Knocker? (Titus Andronicus)
Heather Reisman’s monopoly on the Canadian book market fills me with !ndigo-nation!
I hate used car dealers. They can be so over sell us.