Jesus preached his Thesis on Apiary Psychology, aka the Bee Attitudes.
The Wedding at Cana proved that Jesus was a wine/eau.
Is it true that Jesus was sentenced to be run over by a Chrysler PT?
Yes, He was Cruiserfied.
Did Jesus ever get a haircut?
Yes, He said “Render unto scissor what belongs to scissors!” So it is proven that Jesus shaves.
If Jesus had been a chiropractor, would there have been millions of disc I pulls?
To a hungry monk, cheese is Christ.
Have some fast food – it’s Good Fry Day!
When Jesus was on Earth, the winters were very cold. Luckily he had his 12 apopsicles.
Where in the Bible does Jesus bequeath his woodworking tools?
The Axe of the Apostles!
Said Jesus to the crowd of plastic surgeons: “Jug not, lest ye be jugged!”