Olympic figure skaters are so competitive—that’s why their outfits are covered in sequins.

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When bra manufacturers get a coffee, they like it in a cup; that is, if there should be cups, and assuming they can even see cups; then they drink from de cup, but if they drink too fast they’ll get the hiccups!

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Knitting makes me yarn for the good old days. These days I have nothing but looming deadlines!

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