The world’s first murderer was an Abel-bodied male.
Easter is all about sandwiches. Because heroes on the third day. The disciples thought it was about potato chips. Because they took the body and had it all dressed.
In the Bible, who was stowed away in the belly of a ship?
Jonah of Ark.
No room in the inn? Take it like a manger!
Jesus told a lot of stories about poor people. They are great stories. In fact, they are income parable.
At the Last Supper, Judas ruined Jesus’ omelette. That day became known as Gooed Fried Egg.
Jesus didn’t bring his friend back from the dead. The fellow was merely sleeping. And so it was “Lazy-rus, come forth!”
I got my new refrigerator when it fell from the sky. It was like Amana from heaven.
Jonah fell asleep and got swallowed alive by a whale. Good thing he wasn’t sharkoleptic!
What’s the first resource for an unemployed preacher?
Book of Job.