Proof that Sarah Palin’s child isn’t developmentally delayed is that he can do math. In fact, Trig functions.
Procreation is crazy, aka a zygotic episode.
What my kid asked when he saw a Smurf: ‘Daddy, why is this guy blue?’
In the digital age, how do know your child is potty trained?
When he says ‘iPooed‘.
Some children’s books are awful. Whinny the Poo was complete horse shit.
I was tempted to push my disobedient son into a volcano, in Brat is lava.
My son loves his bottle. The big glug.
When the Impressionist was a kid he ran a Le Monet stand.
Don’t mess with a fat baby. Better instead to give him or her a wide birth.
The strict elementary school principal suspended any student who came down with laryngitis. He did not approve of hoarseplay.