What my kid asked when he saw a Smurf: ‘Daddy, why is this guy blue?’
Some people believe abortion is inevitable. They tend to be fetalists.
Some children’s books are awful. Whinny the Poo was complete horse shit.
Screw the petriarchy – I’m having a test-tube baby!
The chiropractor told my pregnant wife and I that our unborn child should have an adjustment. But I think he was just trying to fetus align.
Why did the pregnant woman spit up her baby?
Because she was expectoring a child!
Don’t mess with a fat baby. Better instead to give him or her a wide birth.
Are there child-eating pigs in Tottenham?
The boy went trick or treating, dressed as a soothing lotion. He was called Aloe Ian.
I want to adopt a kid. The process is so slow. I wish it could happen foster.