A mugger attacked me with a sharp tool, but I knocked him out with a stale baguette. This proves that loaf conquers awl.
The detective fingered the cattle rustler, figuring he had probable cows.
Subway turnstile jumpers are no-fare-ious criminals.
I stole a kilt and I plaid guilty.
So… I beat my boss over the head with a pie chart. And they charged me with a graph-aided assault.
Cleaning mud can lead to a life of grime. It’s a slippery slop.
I recovered my stolen car using the serial number and I feel VINdicated.
Never use a glass bathroom. You’ll be be arrested for loo behaviour and public in-de-can see.
My sister is marrying an organ thief. She says she wants a man after her own heart, someone who can de-liver her from her troubles, and who’ll take care of her two little kidneys after she’s gone.
As for me, I married a woman who had her face surgically removed. For love no nose limits.
Who was the murderer in Celebrity Clue? A: Reese, Witherspoon.