murder puns :: PunGents.com

The lazy priest had a mass idle tendencies.

(1 votes, average: 1.00 out of 5)

I have no regrets about hurling Mr. Potatohead to his death. I yam what I yam.

(10 votes, average: 4.40 out of 5)

There is no truth to the rumour that Vanna White was found dead, disemvoweled.

(2 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)

I’m bed to the bone – I committed mattresscide.

(4 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)

Detectives assigned to gun crimes should ask themselves “What was the killer’s Ammo?”

(8 votes, average: 2.88 out of 5)

The magician nonchalantly stabbed his assistant, displaying remarkable slayed offhand.

(7 votes, average: 1.43 out of 5)

Who was the murderer in Celebrity Clue? A: Reese, Witherspoon.

(7 votes, average: 2.57 out of 5)

Colonel Kurtz took a lot of measures to discipline his soldiers. In fact he spear-headed every one.

(10 votes, average: 4.20 out of 5)

I come from a proud family of accused murderers. Growing up, my mom used to remind us, ‘you can always depend on the kindness of stranglers.’

(3 votes, average: 2.67 out of 5)

Infanticide is a horrific form of smotherly love.

(4 votes, average: 2.75 out of 5)