I just found out that my mother’s sister has been forced to work in a graveyard and I’m in diggin’ aunt about it.
Does my Italian sister wear a lot of jewelry? Sì, bling
When I told my family I was becoming a yoga instructor they looked at me like I was a mat man.
My friend Emma has a family store. They’re afraid it will be taken over soon by Emma’s son.
My father, the deer hunter, loved to travel. I still remember his advice. “Go to Venice, son.“
My mother’s sister was bitten by a snake. I will carefully suck the poison. That’s the antidote.
I come from a family of warmongers. I am belli bellicose to them.
I can’t stand my spouse’s family and she can’t stand mine. We’re kin dread souls.
I come from a proud family of accused murderers. Growing up, my mom used to remind us, ‘you can always depend on the kindness of stranglers.’
My daughter says she wants her eyes, lips, nose and smile to be surgically reconstructed at the cost of thousands of dollars, but I think she’s just going through a face.