I was caught stealing lettuce. Can you blame me? I was just trying to get a head.
I steal flip flops. I’m a cleft-toe maniac.
The Jordanian thief was like Superman, aka Amman of Steal.
My mom’s coat was stolen. It’s a mother-frocking tragedy.
Video game about furniture thieves? Grand Theft Ottoman.
My grandfather once shoplifted a popular video game. Years later, they tracked me down and said “You shall pay for The Sims of your forefathers.“
Someone stole your deodorant? You’ve been reek rolled!
Don’t steal someone else’s dildo: You’ll be convicted of criminal wrongdong.
When my scooter was stolen, I moped.
Had I the talent to be a cat burglar, I rob ably would.