BE PRE PAREDY

Dear Pun Gents, a pun for a group of Cub Scouts going to day camp in the summer. The name of the camp is Camp Kiesel. ~Kent, Layton, UT

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Make sure to eat your lunch: it’s Kiesel fuel.
  2. Scouting is the best: it’s Akela experience
  3. Choosing your bunkmate is the most difficult part: It’s two in tents!
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HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOSTA

Dear Pun Gents, I need a kid-friendly pun on the composer’s name ‘Shostakovich’ ~Randal, Madison, WI

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Didn’t Bob Marley cover him in that reggae song, “I Shostakovich… (But I Didn’t Shoot the Dmitri)”?
  2. Didn’t he get arrested for slipper theft? You know, Shoes Take ovich?
  3. Russian businessmen listen to his music during Shostile Takeovers.
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AVE ATQUE VALENTINE

Dear Pun Gents, I need a terrible (but clean) Valentine’s Day pun. ~Timothy, Arlington, VA

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Feb u marry me?
  2. Ave atque Valetine.
  3. You’re my Val Gal.
  4. VD – I’m spreading my cheer.
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PUNS AND AMMO(NIA)

Dear Pun Gents, I need a catchy title for a science fair project comparing three types of cleaners used on cafeteria tables. I swabbed the table before and after and measured the bacteria that grew. There were lots of bacteria before the tables were cleaned and all cleaners (as well as water) did well cleaning the tables. ~Jeneen, Centreville, VA

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Son of a Bleach!
  2. If this project didn’t work I would come bacteria-eyed
  3. Let us Spray.
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