MELON DE GENERALS?

Dear Pungents, I would like a chortle-worthy comment for writing on a watermelon, for use in a catapult. ~Tim, Nelson, New Zealand

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

1) “We’re getting melon-evil [medieval] on your ass!”

2) “It’s a fruit-d’etat!”

3) “I’ll seed you in mel!” [I’ll see you in hell?… ouch]

4) “Spit-fire? I bet you never seed this coming!”

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