Andrew from Dugald:
Part of a deer hunter’s technique is to always hunt in groups of three – that way you can tri-ungulate the target!
How does the hunter know when he’s in deer habitat? Well, if the ground is up and down, the ungulating terrain is a sure sign.
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Loading...Dear Pungents, My wife is a professional ballerina who is retiring after 16 years. A solo has been created for her incorporating a theme of seashells. I’m proud of my own punmanship, and I don’t want to mussel in on your territory, but I figured I’d call out the heavy artillery for this one. There’s a big retirement party for her, and I want as many “shell” references (without straying too far into the overall “ocean” or “fish” themes). I’ve got the obvious: Lawrence Whelk, shellfish/selfish, but I’ll take any assistance you guys can come up with! With friends like you guys, who needs anemones? ~Lorne, Winnipeg, MB
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
1) Meet George Jetsam.
2) Sea shells Sanctuary (the Cult song, hello??)
3) She’s Prawn Quixote and I’m her Concho Panza.
4) Oh, the clamity!
5) I hope the critics won’t chiton her routine.
6) If Pat Sajak were here he’d ask ‘Would you like to bi a valve?’
7) We thought about calling it ‘Return to Sander‘.
8) This place has pretty good fossilities.
9) I’m lucky to have my wife. I’m glad she was the marine type.
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Andrew from Dugald:
Does a French veterinarian who specializes in neutering male dogs have his office on a cull de sack?
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Andrew from Dugald:
Researchers have come out with a sausage-flavoured dessert for the “Field and Stream” set. Blending pork with venison flavours, the new Hog n’ Does ice cream is bound to please!
My pal Dave says the only downside is that it costs two sows and bucks.
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Dear Pungents, We’re about to join a couples bowling league and need a team name. Thanks! ~Jason and Karen, Cumberland, RI
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
1) Clark Kent and Lois Lane
2) (Don’t) Strike Your Spouse
3) Love to Spare
4) We’re not Splitsville!
(all plays on words)
(Rate This Pun)Loading...The mafia hitman brought candles along to his hit. He had to wax someone. He was wicked.
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Andrew from Dugald:
A singing chimpanzee with open sores has become the latest folk-rock sensation. Despite his skin infection, he has decided to embrace it and will be touring as “Simian and Carbuncle.”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Andrew from Dugald:
Spock never cared for jazz vocalizations, in fact he thought they were crap! The scientist in him would kick in and he’d say, “Scat-illogical, Captain.“
(1 votes, average: 1.00 out of 5)Loading...Andrew from Dugald, MB:
Unlike the large amount of people involved in the singing group based in Salt Lake City, Utah, one single gay fellow is able to fill a room with music on his own. Clacking shelled creatures together, the Mere Man Tap Barnacle Queer is a very unique experience.
I told my girlfriend that sun tanning was bad for her. Disbelieving, she said, ” Oh. Go wan?”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Jay from Rhode Island:
Waddya you call a group of mobile musicians who’ve lost their privileges to play in public?
A marching banned.
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