GOOD VIBRATIONS

Dear Pun Gents, our department is looking for ultrasound puns, preferably around five or so. Thanks! ~Bella, New York City

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Ultrasound? Ow, my ear hertz!
  2. Ultrasounds can be used to detect gravidy.
  3. John Lennon was an ultrasound technician. You know, "Imaging all the People."
  4. Ultrasound machines are unreliable. They break down with high frequency.
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YOU CAN’T SPLIT THIS COUPLE

Dear Pun Gents, puns for a bachelorette party at a bowling alley. ~Michelle, Chicago

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Let's get lane tonight.
  2. Your balls will not be spared.
  3. Fingering Balls
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A LOT RIDES WITH YOU

Dear Pun Gents, I need some puns that combine driving and cycling. They need to promote cycling. ~London, UK

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Get out of your car. You're never two tired to ride.
  2. Bikers aren't crazy. They're just cyclopathic.
  3. Don't Door-a- the explorer. Watch for cyclists.
  4. Don't piss off a cyclist. They get cranky.
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PLANET OF THE APS

Dear Pun Gents, a pun for a government AP class sweatshirt. ~Jhudora, Redwood City, CA

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. What's AP?
  2. AP go lucky
  3. When you work in the government, you get to take an AP all day.
  4. Class AP all the way
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MAKE YOURSELF YOUTHFUL

Dear Pun Gents, I need a pun related to youth, performing arts, music, science or something relevant for a youth showcase exhibit. ~Nhi, Sydney, Australia

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Youthed Goods
  2. Pro-Teen Power
  3. Kidzhibit
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DO THESE SHORTS MAKES MY BATON LOOK GOOD?

Dear Pun Gents, We need a team name for a dozen women running a relay race:  a 'Saints' race in June and a 'Sinners' race in October. ~Wendy, Pleasant Grove, UT

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Chicks with Styx
  2. The Lois Lanes
  3. Batoning the Hatches
  4. Apostles of Hustle
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LEND ME YOUR YEARS

Dear Pun Gents, we're making t-shirts to advertise our 3-D yearbook, and need a pun on the back to get people talking. ~Adam, Duluth, GA

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Our students are multi-dimensional.
  2. Life begins at three-D.
  3. What's weirder than a 3D yearbook? A graduating cylinder!
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PARTICLE-ULAR REQUEST

Dear Pun Gents, I need a scientific pun for the word 'mole'. ~Ashley, Sacramento, CA

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Avocado's Number: The amount of particles in a guaco mole.
  2. Those who study moles have compound interests.
  3. Avogadro claimed to have cured acne–by showing that, even if you had 6.02 x 10^^23 zits on your face, they are still just the size of one mole.
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SHOOT UP A WEDDING

Dear Pun Gents, I need a pun about wedding photographers! ~Monica, Santa Monica, CA

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. The bride and groom deserve to be shot!
  2. The bride shows a lot of composition
  3. I wouldn't Portrait this day for anything.
  4. Wedding photographer's favourite flowers? Posies.
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EAR WAXING POETIC

Dear Pun Gents, I'm writing a term paper on cochlear implants and need some puns for the titles of different sections. Anything about cochlear implants, signal processing, or the history of them. ~Krista, St. Louis, MO

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Cochly Accent
  2. Pinna Tail on the Donkey
  3. Where Do We Go From Hear?
  4. That's Auditory!
  5. Beethoven's Fifth Tympani
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