Cannibals rely on fossil fuels, especially bit human.
Month: March 2015
Drinking Metamucil really gets the potty started.
Yodelling is a cry for alp.
Eating greasy high cholesterol food gives me stage fright. I get butter fries in my stomach.
In corrupt judicial systems, witnesses can be bribed with testimoney.
What’s the medicine for winter headaches? A spring.
Too cold to drink? Have a mojito.
What’s the difference between a reptile and a cannibal? One’s an alligator, the other’s a leg eater.
PRESSURE LUCK
Dear Pun Gents,
I am looking for several slogans for a new mobile massage company in Ca. Will be tweeting 2-4X per week. View the website at elevateinhome.com
60-120 minute massages to your home, office, hotel door. No happy endings, purely legit. We are competing with two established companies, but adding extras like custom music playlists, in-home chef prepared meal. No sexual innuendo please. THANKS! ~David J
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
- We put the rest in stressed
- Pressure luck
- We’re Hands Some
- Kneadful things
- Knot a Problem
- Above the Rest
- We knead your business
- We can help you with that pain ting
- Relax with real acts
- There Therapy
- Everybody must get hot stoned
- Shiatsu happens
- Go for a Tuina hand-wich
- Go for a Hot Cup of Jo [if you have a therapist named Jo]
- Rolfing makes me ROLFMAO
Do manatees tempt sailors?