Andrew from Dugald:
A westerner was touring a monastery in Tibet, the home to its religious leader. He came across a room filled with trumpets. He asked a monk why the instruments should be in such a place. He said that before he became the Exalted One, their leader had wanted to be a jazz musician. “You mean…?” the westerner started. “Yes,” the monk nodded, knowingly,”these are the Horns of the Dalai Lama!”
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Loading...Panoramic from Toronto:
The undergrad was stumped on some matrix algebra. The
prof calmed him down saying “Don’t worry, eigendoit.“
Panoramic says, “Nerdy!”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Ben from Toronto:
What do I hate about family ‘feud’? The custardy battle!
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Timo from Victoria:
Reporter asks the Quebec premier, “When you go to see the Queen will you
talk about Quebec separation?”
Premier: “Absolutely not! But when the butler shows up with refreshments
I’ll talk about sovereign tea.”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Dear Pungents, alright, I actually paid your asses! Grad students unite! Now, I’m doing a thesis using qualitative methods; specifically in-depth, semi-structured interviews. Could you give me a few puns on this motif. ~Dre, Oshawa, Ontario
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
1) “Before research techniques were codified, all social science papers were reliable as crap. They should have called them graduate feces.”
2) “My interview data may raise a small storm of controversy. That’s what happens with squallitative methods.”
3) “Did the study on racial epithets make use of in-depth slurveys?”
4) “I took some hardcore drugs to clarify my thinking about research protocols. I’m a big fan of the crystal meth-od.”
5) “My conclusions just won’t stick. I need some ad-thesive!”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Andrew from Dugald, MB:
Would a punny priest with a cheesy sense of humour be an irReverend Muenster?
AND
Switzerland’s great psychologist had a fondness for cheese, but had to steer clear of Dutch varieties as they stained his hands. Sad to say, but only the gouda dye Jung.
Andrew says, “I can see the arguments, these puns are full of holes, but don’t be too harsh, I camembert it much longer.”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Dear Pungents, a pun please for an anaesthetist who came to Toronto from PEI to visit his daughter. And/or a pun about medicine, the aforementioned doctor, Summerside, PEI and a new hospital. Doctors love punning in the O.R. and I want my dad to have the punning edge! ~Marie, Toronto
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
1) “Anaesthetists have a lot of options. With them it’s ether/or.”
OR
2) “My anaesthetist father never lets me have my way. He always puts me under the neither!”
3) “Anaesthetists are obsessed with their patients’ hair – they’re always keeping track of Vidal signs.”
4) “Did you hear about the posh anaethetist? He went to an IV League school!”
5) “When I moved to Toronto my dad got so upset he stopped believing in God. I guess it’s cause he’s an atheistician.”
6) “Why are proctologists like anaesthetists? Because they’re anus-squeezy-ologists!”
Also
7) “Prince Edward Islanders are becoming morbidly obese. No wonder they located a new hospital in Sumoside.”
8) “This new facility ain’t worth a prostitute’s saliva! They should have called it the Summerside Ho-Spittle.”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Brigg from East Greenbush, NY:
What’s a roofer’s favourite type of scotch?
Shingle malt, of course.
Brigg says, “another submission from Brigg.”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Brigg from East Greenbush, NY:
What’s a roofer’s favourite type of scotch?
Shingle malt, of course.
Brigg says, “another submission from Brigg.”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...CT from Toronto:
What do you call a red-headed girl whose brain chemistry tells her that
her parents are never coming home?
Little Endorphin Annie.
CT says, “I had to fiddle with the setup – before it was ‘what do you call a red-headed girl with hyperactive brain chemicals’?.”
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