If you want to hand out communion, you have to assign a wafer.
Never negotiate with a hungry pontiff. It’s better to have a Pope-is-full discussion.
What does a Pope say to an Anti-Pope? “See you in halo.”
In the postmodern Catholic Church, every assumption will be deaconstructed.
When the Vatican announced that cows could be ordained priests, the bovines could scarcely contain their heifervestments
The strip club dancer once attended mass, but now she’s a laps Catholic.