The average length of time taken for a new faculty member to attain the rank of full professor at a university is around ten years.

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I want to get a 9 to 5 job, so I’m giving up my fun-loving college lifestyle. I’m so tired of the frat race!

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Why do cannibals attending university only eat the head, the buttocks and the genitals?

Because they’re so skull-ass-dick!

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