Proctological lexicon aka the sore ass.
When you join the military, they light your bum on fire as part of the ass-immolation process.
NED: A dog clawed at my anus!
ED: Oh no.
NED: Now I have an injured paws terrier.
Footage of my colonoscopy is being made into a feature film! It should be quite the enematic spectacle.
Aspen, Colorado is a hotbed of proctological accidents.
Are proctologists competent?
Yes, probe ably.
If a proctologist smells well, it’s because he wears expensive colon. As for urologists, they prefer eau de toilette.
The proctologist cut down drastically on his patient load, because he was on hole-a-day.
When in university, proctologists have a hard time making ends meet. Some even have to resort to prostate tuition.
Accounts receivable for colonoscopy services tend to be in a rears.