Do Scotsmen dance the lamb baa da?

Do Scotsmen dance the lamb baa da?

Dear Pungents, our school is doing a “Santa goes green’ concert, and the penguins are protesting the use of nonrenewable forms of energy. Got any slogans that the penguins might put on their protest signs? Thanks! ~Jill, Clearwater, FLA
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT [a bit late for Xmas, sorry Jill!]
Dear Pungents, how about puns twisting famous authors’ names into idioms? What got me started was seeing a shirt that said “My way or the Hemingway.” What else can we do with author’s names and idioms/aphorisms/cliches? Maybe if Shakespeare met Descartes… “I think therefore iamb?” ~Mike, Warren, OH
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
Dear Pungents, I need a pun about an ultrasound that shows that my baby won’t be one of those pooping babies. ~Noetica, Oakland, CA
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
Andrew from Dugald:
Since the American financial sector has basically gone in the crapper due to bad loans, are lenders of last resort guilty of giving credit, where credit is……doo-doo?
Stop maiming each other; we’re running out of Gauze-a!
How do astronomers make discoveries? By cosmosis.
Midgets can’t be more than four feet high. That is a too-tall-ogy.
I saw a lowlife cruising for loose women on the beach. I said “What kind of conch you buyin‘?” He said, “She’s my beach—a shore thing. I don’t care what pebble think, if they sea us together. I hope I end up all tide up.”
Keanu Reeves’ bio-pic will be a tale of whoa.