The municipal government decided to withdraw funds from their lawnbowling leagues, and hold a massive city-wide orgy instead. Needless to say, the associations of elderly lawnbowlers protested this senseless act of de-bocce-ry.

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Was the Reign of Terror peaceful? It was a blood-loss revolution, after all.

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The embattled Russian emperor was thrown into a ditch. Upon being pulled out, he remarked, “I am not a fan of Czar chasm.”

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The best place for a politician to apologize? Parle-lament.

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