After a heavy bookcase fell on him, the wounded soldier was never the same. It was a sad case of shelf-shock.
NED: I have an irrational fear that Santa will get tossed from his sleigh.
ED: What’s that?
Hear about the dyslexic man who would eat too much dessert, then immediately go play at the lanes?
He suffered from pie-bowler disorder.
My greatest sphere is that the Earth is round.
I don’t like cheap pens. I’m fauxbic.
Did you hear about the dyslexic gambler who was addicted to Jack Black movies?
People who keep repeating themselves are sick. They’re ill iterate.
Are bulimics all bile lingual?
Although they are annoying, don’t swat away the pigeons. They might get depressed, and commit shoo-aside.
NED: If I grab your ass in a bar, it’s not my fault.
ED: Why’s that?
NED: Because I suffer from copaphilia!