Andrew from Dugald:
We all know the Grim Reaper and how he wields a tool (his scythe); what we don’t really know is his sexual preferance. Thus, it could be said that he is a bi-sickle mechanic.
Tweens loitering in shopping centres are often unwanted mallingerers.
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Loading...Frank from Eldorado:
From Frank’s New and Improved Dictionary (pertaining to the Theory of Relativity):
claimant: female “relative” who asserts that she is the sister or sister-in-law of one’s mother or father.
truant: female relative who IS the sister or sister-in-law of one’s mother or father.
carbuncle: brother or brother-in-law of one’s mother or father on sugar-free diet.
ALSO
Press release: the generals of the U.S. Army expressed their tanks to the Pentagon for supplying new armoured vehicles.
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Andrew from Dugald:
Never get into an discussion with a clown about the details of his routine. He’ll just start arguing some antics.
(Rate This Pun)Loading...The sculptors up in Nunavut are known for their three-dimensional relief technique aka the Deep Frieze.
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Andrew from Dugald:
When it comes to the topic of making babies, everbody is an ex-spurt.
Andrew says, “tanx for the mammaries.”
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Andrew from Dugald, MB:
“re your Lord of the Rings puns…”
Where do homeless Baggins go for shelter?
Hobbit-Tot for Humanity.
(3 votes, average: 2.33 out of 5)Loading...Calvin from Edmonton:
The gospel of John records the story of Jesus turning water into wine at a wedding that had run out of wine. Not as well-known is that at the same wedding, they also ran out of cheese (it was a wine and cheese affair). Jesus performed a similar miracle for that. As you know, for the wine miracle, Jesus had servants fill jars with water and take them to the wine steward, who on tasting it found it to be better wine than what had already been served. Well for the second miracle he had servants load rectangular bricks and round stones of various sizes onto boards and bring them to the party’s food coordinator. On seeing a fully prepared fete du fromage appear before him the chief caterer simply exclaimed, “Cheeses sliced!“
(Rate This Pun)Loading...Kepler and Galileo were deadlocked in the finals of the Great Astronomy Puns Contest. So judge Spooner was called in to Brahe-cho the Ty.
(4 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5)Loading...Frank from Eldorado, ON:
From Frank’s New and Improved Dictionary:
chestnuts: extremely rare anatomical oddity, when the male reproductive glands are located on the upper, frontal part of the torso.
colonize: medical procedure, transplant of lower part of alimentary canal.
masturbates: young male offspring of Lord Bates.
chicanery: cross between a chicken and a canary.
(1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)Loading...