Mafiosos who mock their friends are apt to dis a peer.
crime
Going to jail isĀ quite the bar gain.
Someone stole my Swedish car: it’s a real Saab story. I don’t mean to get emotional; I guess I’m too inVolvo’ed. Heck I’ve even considered going scuba diving, to see if it’s buried underwater – but I’m afraid of getting the Benz. I know, it’s my own fault; I really should be driving a Mazda Me-oughta, especially after the hos had blown on my loaner, a Poontiac. GM cars really make me Buick. (As for British imports – get Bentley!)
Prison novels have their prose and cons.
My grandfather once shoplifted a popular video game. Years later, they tracked me down and said “You shall pay for The Sims of your forefathers.“
A lynch mob formed after the cat killed a mouse. They decided to round up a pussy.
What do pickpockets and political writers have in common?
One is pursecuted, the other is prose-cuted.
Usually when you hear about Norway it’s Oslo news day.
Crime goes up at the end of winter. When I got home the other day my house was burglarized. I said ‘This is the first robbin’ of spring!’
NED: I was arrested for committing lewd acts atop a dolphin!
ED: Really?! Are you guilty?
NED: No way! Even though they caught me, there was a misunderstanding.
ED: Are you saying you didn’t do it on porpoise?