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Puns tagged ‘drugs’:

07/04/14

When Rob Ford came back it was like ‘Release the Crackin!

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (4 votes, average: 4.75 out of 5)
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05/20/14

‘Lizard bacon’ is an idea I thought of while smoking my-iguana. It turned out to taste quite skinky. 

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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04/01/14

Tylenol gives me hallucinations of windmills. Acetominophens.

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02/20/14

Sleeping pills are art. They have anaesthetic quality.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (2 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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02/19/14

Confession: I’ve been eating my kid’s dolls, all hopped up on Barbie chew ates. But I Ken stop at any time.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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12/13/13

You can wed your lizard in the US. They just legalized marry iguana.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (2 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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11/15/13

Rob Ford’s favourite sport: the have pipe.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (3 votes, average: 3.67 out of 5)
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10/17/13

First step of Cokeaholics Anonymous: admit there is a Higher Powder.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (2 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)
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02/18/13

I ruined every tuxedo I ever had. In fact I admit to abusing far mo’ suiticals.

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (3 votes, average: 4.33 out of 5)
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01/17/13

Lance Armstrong felt better after appearing on Oprah. She gave him performance-enhancing hugs. Nonetheless, Lance committed male fraud: He was master of the pellets-on. Somehow he  never failed his testes—he didn’t stop until he had one. Now, stripped of his Tour titles, the most shocking revelation is that Lance has a No Jersey accent. Anyway I guess it’s back to eating Sheryl Crow. [The Gents thank Ashley, Bryan and Jordan for collaborating on today's puns!]

TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (10 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)
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