Convicted murderers don’t cry. They lacriminal glands.
Month: December 2019
The exercise book about situps was very abs tract.
I made a pass, and the woman at the bar threw her drink at me. That sent Chivas down my spine.
Ancient Egyptian mummifiers practised poor hygiene. Unfortunately they didn’t have time to clean out the mummies’ bowels, before the bodies were in turd.
What did the spore from Romania say to the urinating man?
“I’m yeast and yer a-peein’!”
Don’t sit on a scarf – you’ll get your ascot.
If all the world’s bivalves became extinct, it would be a clamity.
When I die, please skip the embalming. I’m not one for empty formaldehydes. These are my final odours.
Jews who celebrate Christmas are rare. They’re definitely in the menorah-tree.
An eastern US mountain range by any other name would still be the Appalachian.