The necrophiliac gold-digger married a drowned corpse because she heard he was bloated.
Snakes are looking just for a place to be long.
What’s a mafia hitman’s breakfast beverage of choice?
Cap a gino!
Who’s the strongest basketball player? A: LeBron.
I quit the mafia to become a housekeeper. Now I’m a maid man.
Sheep will get pretty messed up if you make them go snorkeling. You know – because of the skew-ba gear.
NED: Joe Malignant is no longer my friend.
ED: Why not?
NED: Because – he’s always spreading tumours about me!
Fat-free dairy products may promote healthy living, but yoga hurts.
What’s a flasher’s favourite meal?
The triumphant geologist shouted, “All your basalt belong to us!”