EQUAL RITES

Dear Pun Gents, something about freedom of religion I can use in a skit (eg for ‘peaceful assembly’, a kid making a lego sculpture) ~Aiedail, Livonia

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Rapper: Christ Cross
  2. Buddha Man [Boo the Man]
  3. Old people who’ve had joint replacement surgery enjoy freedom of wors hips
  4. Bible? In this country you can buy whatever bull you choose.
  5. Those who practice religious oppression will get a few pious in the face.
  6. Hindu what you want
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FERMENT BELIEVER

Dear Pun Gents, I home-brew beer and I’m looking to create a ‘patron saint of beer’ for a logo. Something along the lines of my old favorite: “Patron Saint of Fireworks: St. Mary IgniteUs. (you can use that one) ~Ernest, Worcester, MA

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. St. Brewno
  2. St. Al Cahal
  3. St. Maximus Buzzinski
  4. St. Ibeerius
  5. St. Inebrius Di Still
  6. St. Stoutus
  7. St. Hopsgood
  8. Thomas A-wine-us – The saint with an ale’o
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PLAGUE IT AGAIN, SAM

Dear Pun Gents, I am writing a news article on the story of the Pied Piper of Hamelin for both a tabloid and a broadsheet but I dont know what the two headlines should be, please could you help me with some clever puns? ~Greg, London, UK

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Plague it Again, Sam
  2. On a Fluting Spree
  3. Rattaboy!
  4. The Verminator
  5. He Just Rodent To Town…
  6. Now Appearing on Kids Row
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THANK YOUR LOUSY STARS

Dear Pun Gents,  I am writing an article for our church newsletter about being thankful in spite of adversity and need a title for the article. ~Tuan, Honolulu (long-time fan)

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Get Stoic-ed
  2. It’s Chic to Turn Cheek
  3. Thank Your Lousy Stars
  4. Pray Of Light
  5. Sufferman
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SAVIOUR THE DATE!

Dear Pun Gents, I’m making a movie poster for an art history class on early Netherlandish paintings and I’m trying to crack a joke about the ‘mystic marriage’ of St. Catherine to the baby Jesus. HELP! What would make a funny title? ~Leslie, Baton Rouge, LA

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. My How He’s Groom!
  2. J.C. and the Pious Cats
  3. Saviour the Date!
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SUN THING SPECIAL

Dear Pun Gents, we need a beach house name in Kure (pronounced ‘curry’) Beach, North Carolina. Owners in medical field, house aqua-colored. Looking for something clever but not pretentious or dirty.  “A Shore Cure” or Seas the Day? Can’t we do better? ~Carrie, Raleigh, NC

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Don’t Kure, Beach Happy
  2. Carolina on the Beach
  3. Sun Thing Special
  4. Kure Patience
  5. Aquazy House
  6. Sand from Heaven
  7. Smile and Wave
  8. Kure-B Your Enthusiasm
  9. Perfect Tans
  10. Tidyllic
  11. Tidal Pleasures
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CHARADENFREUDE

Dear Pun Gents, our company is having a Pictionary contest, and we’d like a punny name to cover four ladies who can’t draw! ~Shari, Romeoville,IL

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Charade-Donnay
  2. Pic Lasso
  3. Scribblers on the Roof
  4. Charaded Wit
  5. Slim Pictions
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GEWURTZ + MUSIC BY…

Dear Pun Gents, we need a team name for a music-themed wine tasting and quiz. Team names are to include rock/music star/act and possibly be related to wine. We are three girls and one guy – please help! ~Catherine, Aberdeen, Scotland

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
  1. Death Cabernet for Cutie
  2. House of the Riesling Sun
  3. All Time Best Cellars
  4. Chordannay
  5. April Wine
  6. Port-ishead
  7. Brandy
  8. Glassic Rock
  9. We are the Champagnes
  10. We’re Hardcork
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MCRONI

Dear Pun Gents, see what you can do with Manchester; namely the M’C’R. I’ve already exhausted the emcee’s are puns …anyways hope to hear from you soon. ~Ed, Glucoseville

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. I M C R ious!
  2. An odd fellow grew breasts and then fused them together. He played for Man-Chesty United.
  3. I am blind when it comes to women. I’m a man seer.
TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (3 votes, average: 2.33 out of 5)
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