How did ancient bar-goers settle their tabs?
Can a mathematician marry his cosin?
What’s the best time to practise your arithmetic? A: Summer.
To use algebra to determine the worth of a chicken, simply calculate its egginvalues.
The fastidious mathematician’s favourite show was Ln Order.
Do mathematicians prefer farming by hand?
No – they’re pro tractor.
Bible science: A mathematician swinging a donkey was refused entry on No Ass Arc.
Proof that Sarah Palin’s child isn’t developmentally delayed is that he can do math. In fact, Trig functions.
To make math more sexy, be like Marilyn Monroe: Sum like it’s hot.
When a mathematician suffers a flesh wound, he should apply a Gauzian distribution of bandages. And remember to use Fermat pressure.