If you live in North Korea, don’t mock Kim Jong-il’s nuclear ambitions: it means dis missile.
Uber is in trouble because it doesn’t pay any taxi.
A vehicle full of nasty Bronx cougars? Cargoyles.
When the saviour of Nottingham Forest got an honourary degree from Oxford, he had to wear a robe and hood.
What do you call a beer taster in Ireland?
A Guinness Pig.
If you look at these digital photos of the wounded soldier up close, it looks like he was shot by a Canon.
What does a Hispanic cow say?
“Moo chews grass yes!”
In Russia and Ukraine, it’s easy to find wifey hotspots.
I refuse to make my own sandwich. I rely on sub contractors.
Don’t baptize your children: it’s a chrism sentence.


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